


PITCH BLACK (Eliza's Interlude)

by LightningInABottle



Series: BLUE LIPS [8]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Break Up, Cheating, Coming Out, F/F, F/M, Human Disaster Alexander Hamilton, Infidelity, Moving On, Moving Out, POV Eliza Schuyler, Sad Eliza Schuyler, Song Lyrics, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-10
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-10-07 13:25:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17366675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LightningInABottle/pseuds/LightningInABottle
Summary: Eliza Schuyler had known for a while what her boyfriend, Alexander Hamilton, did during those long nights he didn't come home. But when her sister returns, accompanied by another woman, bearing a revelation and other news, Eliza is forced to confront the truth.She needs to be strong, to make her way through the pitch black world she's suddenly pushed into.





	PITCH BLACK (Eliza's Interlude)

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome back to Act 2!  
> For enhanced reading experience, listen to PITCH BLACK by Tove Lo  
> (And read the previous works of Act 1)

It was pitch black outside when Eliza Schuyler opened the door to her apartment, the long-broken light fixture in the hallway of the building providing no illumination. But despite the darkness, she was able to make out two faces, one of them as familiar as the photos she kept framed on her dresser, and the other a stranger. Eliza’s face broke out in a grin, and she temporarily forgot about how Alexander still wasn’t home, how he hadn’t been home on time in weeks. She all but lunged past her doorframe, throwing her arms around her sister and accidentally disturbing the other girl, who smiled politely. 

“Angie!” Eliza laughed, the tension in her heart unraveling somewhat in the presence of her older sister. Angelica could help her, give her advice on what to do about Alexander. But she didn’t think about that now, overwhelmed with happiness. “I missed you, but I thought you were still in London.” Angelica smiled sheepishly at her, stepping inside and beckoning the other girl in as well. Eliza locked the door behind them, resigning herself to seeing Alexander stumble back home in the morning, the smell of someone else’s cologne on him. 

“Actually,” Angelica said, exchanging a look with her companion, who nodded reassuringly. “I’ve been in the states for a few months now, living with Pegs.” Immediately, Eliza’s smile dropped, replaced by confusion. They had been talking for such a long time about how good it would be to finally have Angelica back with the rest of the family; why would she lie?

“I’m sorry, what?” Eliza’s voice was slightly hoarse as she frowned, furrowing her eyebrows. Angelica just hugged her once more, chewing on her lip when she pulled away. 

“I got offered a job at a firm here, managed to grab my degree early. I was going to tell you as soon as I showed up but…” Angelica swallowed hard, turning back to make eye contact with the girl, who shuffled forward, steps uncertain. “Y’know what, I think there’s somebody you have to meet. Eliza, this is Maria Lewis. Maria, this is my sister.” Eliza didn’t miss the way Maria’s eyes lit up at being introduced that way, although why, she couldn’t say. 

“Nice to meet you, Eliza,” Maria extended her hand, and Eliza shook it. Although Maria seemed nice, it still didn’t explain why Angelica hadn’t contacted her. But then Maria spoke and Eliza couldn’t help the way her mouth fell open in a silent gasp of surprise, all the pieces fitting together. “I’m Angelica’s girlfriend.” 

Oh.  _ Oh.   _

Eliza tried to speak, to say something, to tell Angelica that she shouldn’t have been scared to come out because Eliza would accept her no matter what. But maybe she hesitated a few seconds too long, because anxiety flashed across Angelica’s face, clear as day. It was such a strange look on her normally confident sister’s face that it sent a pang through Eliza’s chest, even worse than the one she felt when she saw dark red marks on Alexander’s neck. 

“I’m so sorry, ‘Liza, I just...the very first night I was in New York, I was still emotional from Church so the thing with Maria happened and I—” Angelica was rambling, another rare occurrence, but her endless flow of words immediately calmed when Maria laid a hand on her arm. “I didn’t know how to tell you.” Eliza finally found what to say.

“You don’t need to be sorry. You’re still my sister, no matter what.” To lighten the mood, Eliza tried joking. “And don’t you think I’ve already had to deal with Alex’s emotional coming out?” Instead of laughing along like Eliza hoped they would, both Angelica and Maria’s faces fell. The looks they gave her, full of unadulterated pity, made her heart plummet.

Before either of them even spoke, the feeling already crept up on Eliza. It was the feeling of stepping into a room you knew would have light, only to have everything shut off, leaving you in terror and uncertainty and darkness. It was the feeling of walking down the stairs, only to miss a step and have your whole world fall out from under you. It was the feeling of leaning on the rail of a balcony only to have it disappear and send you free-falling. Only it was a hundred times worse because Eliza  _ knew  _ she should have seen it coming. But she didn’t, or maybe she just chose not to acknowledge it.

“There’s actually another reason we’re here. Alex, he…” Angelica trailed off, and nobody needed to say anything after that, because Eliza nodded, choking out two words, before falling back on the couch, tears already catching on her lashes.

“ _ I know,”  _ she whispered, then again, through the sobs that seemed to shake her frame. “ _ I know.”  _ Angelica was the first to move, wrapping her arms around Eliza and holding her close, murmuring promises of everything being okay. But it  _ wasn’t. _ Nothing was okay and the worst part was that Eliza had  _ known.  _ She had seen it on him, smelled it on him. Fuck, she’d even seen the way Thomas Jefferson looked at her boyfriend, but she chose to ignore it for...how long had it even been? A year? 

“Oh my god, Liza, I’m so...I can’t believe I didn’t see him for the assbag he is.” Angelica continued to speak, and Maria came to sit on the other side of Eliza, patting her arm in order to steady her. Eliza felt like she was breaking apart, unable to handle the whirlpool of emotions in her. From guilt to rage to, most of all,  _ heartbreak.  _ “If I had realized, I would have thrown him in the Atlantic before letting him get near you.” Maria wasn’t completely silent either, although Eliza got the sense that she didn’t really know what to be doing.

“You don’t deserve him,” Maria said, her voice quiet but resolute. “Take it from me, guys will  _ destroy you  _ if you give them any power over you.” Eliza didn’t know how long it was before she finally straightened up, all the sobs in her body seemingly gone, replaced by empty numbness. Maria was right, Alexander had already taken too much from her. He wouldn’t take her tears as well. 

Eliza dried her eyes with the back of her hand, the bones in her body that she had been sure were fracturing apart, now fortified with steel. Her skin was cold, jeweled metal that would tear Alexander to shreds if he ever tried to touch her again. Alexander may have been her beams of light, but he had gone dark long before today. 

“I don’t want to stay with him anymore,” she finally said, knowing that despite the fact that she probably looked pathetic, she felt stronger than ever before. Angelica nodded immediately, helping Eliza stand. 

“You can come stay with Peggy and I. There’s a futon in our apartment,” she offered, lips turning up weakly. “A sleepover, like when we were back in high school.” 

Although Eliza would have normally hated being offered help like this, she also knew that she wouldn’t be able to spend another night in Alexander’s presence, not when she was forced to confront the fact that he... _ cheated  _ her. Eliza knew she would’ve given him everything, been his perfect match if only he’d let her. But if he couldn’t stay loyal, then Eliza would give him nothing, not even a second of time. 

“Thank you.” Eliza turned to the tiny closet by the bathroom and pulled out a duffel bag, making her way to their bedroom— _ Alexander’s bedroom— _ and grabbing a few clothes, along with other essentials. She grabbed a picture of her family but tipped the one of her and Alexander into the trash bin.  _ Let him notice it, _ she thought, or maybe hoped. Angelica and Maria watched her with concerned eyes, and when Eliza moved to face them once more, she did her best to keep it together. After all, she pretended to be oblivious for a year, she could pretend to be strong for a day. 

When she rejoined Angelica and Maria, she found herself wrapped up in their arms once more. Eliza wasn’t sure if her speech was choked up by laughter or by tears.

“Really, guys, I’ll be alright. We can come back for the other stuff later, but for now…” Eliza’s gaze flickered between her sister and her sister’s girlfriend, a smile that was actually genuine building on her face. But even so, a small shard of pain was still lodged in her heart, freezing her veins. “I want to know how this entire thing happened. Maybe y’all can catch me up?” Maria pursed her lips in response, leading them out the door. Eliza was suddenly glad she had found time to tug on a coat, because the November air was even cooler now. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to wait for Alex to come back? You could chew him out plenty well,” Maria suggested as Eliza locked the door, swinging the bag over her shoulder and carefully walking through the darkness to the stairs. 

“To be honest, I don’t even want to see—” Eliza’s words were cut off when, through the stuffy, dim lighting, she caught sight of  _ him.  _ Alexander Hamilton looked positively wrecked, his hair sticking up in different directions, eyes feral and reddened, weed and alcohol and desperation seeping off of him. The second his eyes met Eliza’s, an incoherent plea for forgiveness left his mouth. 

_ “Jesus Christ, Betsy, I’m so fucking sorry I just...please forgive me I know I don’t deserve it but I’m so sorry for everything.”  _

Eliza cut him off with a sharp scoff, silencing Angelica’s enraged reply by simply slipping past Alexander and continuing to walk downstairs, pulling Angelica along with Maria trailing behind only seconds later. Just seeing Alexander again had ignited so many broken feelings, the closest thing to love she could possibly muster up. How could she still love someone who betrayed her so viciously, so cruelly, for so long?

“Alexander, I’m leaving.” Those three words seemed to finally break both of their composures, because hot tears welled up in both of their interlocked eyes. This was it. 

“Don’t go,” Alexander whispered, his voice cracking. “Don’t leave me alone.” 

Eliza didn’t say anything, she didn’t need to. All she did was open the door of her apartment building and step outside, onto the street, which still somehow seemed pitch black despite the city lights. But looking to her left and right, she could see Angelica and Maria by her side, protecting her. 

Everything hurt and Eliza didn’t know how long it would hurt. But here, reunited with her sister and someone who her sister cared about greatly, about to greet her youngest sibling once more, Eliza knew one thing: she was going to be okay. 

She just wished the same could be said for Alexander. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Act 2 is finally here!! If you've been listening to the songs, you will definitely be seeing a change in mood. Not necessarily angstier, but definitely more serious. Updates might be a little slower because life's been busy for me lately. <3   
> I really hope you enjoyed reading this story, so please tell me what you thought!  
> A huge thank you to my love, swanofthelake! I wouldn't be the writer I am without you, and you mean the world to me <3   
> Thank you again for reading!


End file.
